The Knicks: Fifty and Beyond

The New York Knicks suffered loss number 50 this past weekend.

Fans fear not, because humor can help anyone through despair...

"Epiphanny Prince, a 17-year-old New York girl, broke the city's high school girls basketball record when she scored 113 points in a game this week, leading her team to a 137-32 victory. To be fair, they were playing the Knicks." -Tina Fey, from Saturday Night Live.

[Excerpt from the NYTimes, Howard Beck, 3.6.06, pg. D1]

When he is not the host of the Oscars, Jon Stewart is the host of a fake news show, so who better than Stewart to assess the state of the Knicks, who often look like a fake N.B.A. team?

Stewart...was recently asked by Sports Illustrated when he expected another championship parade.

"I'm not a believer in Easter religions," Stewart told the magazine, "but when Walt (Clyde) Frazier is reincarnated as a point guard that can run the team. So that could be awhile."

---------------

"Knicks Trade Draft Pick to Raptors In Exchange for Three Wins," reads the headline in The Onion's online edition. "I don't think there's any question that this immediately makes us a better team. Just look at the standings," Isiah Thomas, the Knicks' president, is quoted as saying in the spoof...

Chortle, chortle...