Laker Steals Birthday Cake [J. Mark English]

This has got to be one of the most bizarre stories to come out of the NBA of late. For a league trying to get rid of a thug league reputation this cannot help Sports Illustrated:

A man walking down the street at bar-closing time with a $190 cake in his arms claimed Los Angeles Lakers center Kwame Brown swiped his birthday treat.

But authorities said the cake caper won't be prosecuted.

In a police report, Alexander Martinez said he left his 30th birthday celebration at the Shore Restaurant and Lounge at about 1:45 a.m. Saturday with the uneaten 2-by-2-foot cake and walked north toward the Blue 32 nightclub.

Martinez told police he first came upon Lakers forward Ronny Turiaf, who he said agreed to pose for a photograph with him and the chocolate cake.

But outside of Blue 32, the 6-foot-11, 270-pound Brown came along, grabbed the cake and threw it at Martinez, according to the report. Brown got into a white limousine and left, Martinez claimed in the report, although he didn't suggest any reason for the cake toss.

Martinez reported that he then walked up to Lamar Odom as the Lakers forward left Pedone's Pizza and confronted him about the cake, which was splattered on the birthday man's back.

- Sports Illustrated